Are You Ready?

Are you ready?

A simple question that does not get answered honestly way too often.

Now this question does have plenty of meaning behind it depending on the context in which someone decides to use it, this could refer to being ready to leave, ready to eat, ready to love, ready for the next step etc.

When it comes to relationships this isn't a question that first enters our mind. Our feelings and wants take over that space of logic in our brains because we are no longer thinking of readiness. Thoughts of the future, plans, acceptance, happiness, warmth cloud our hearts and cerebrum instead.

What if we all actually took a moment to truly comprehend what it really means to turn two people into three (no I am not talking about procreation), I am referring to two individually yoked people coming into a union or relationship to build something more, thus creating a triangle in the relationship. The ideology behind 1+1= 2 does not apply to here cause that would imply just the bases of two humans coming together and nothing more.

This year I learned a lot about love and the way that I love and show love. After further self-examination I realized those times that I placed blame on others for fail relationships or situationships it was more so my fault and not solely theirs. Yes, I a woman is owning up to the flaws that I have from within that caused things in my relationships to go south or fail from the very beginning without even realizing.

It took someone very special to me to show me that maybe I was not quite ready for what I've wanted in terms of relationships. The person did not even know what truth they brought to my world until I began to display the same behaviors I had previously shown with others and this persons reactions was not to just go with it but to stop me in my tracks and allow me to question myself.

Imagine someone placing a mirror in front of your face and through their actions they show you where you have been going wrong,  without ever saying a word. Here you are now, confused as to why they aren't acting or responding the way others did. With every conversation I began to see exactly where I went wrong and more importantly was able to stop myself from nearing the same path that caused so much pain, rejection and hurt.

Some of us love the only way we know how, because of our childhood or things we face growing up. Until someone who truly cares shows us different and this does not have to be in the sense of romance but could be a friend as well.

Relationships require so much more than "oh he or she makes me happy", your love should be based on what you have brought to the relationship, and what you can add to one another. This is where honesty plays a huge role. It's okay to talk about past traumas, your childhood, things that make you happy, things that make you sad. These are honest conversations. There are a lot of people who love the idea of a relationship until they see what someone can bring or give and its too much to bear because they do not measure to reality that is in front of them.

Don't waste someone's time, be truthful with your intentions.

So once again I ask Are you ready?

If not leave that person alone for someone who is....

With Love K.